casual sex is healthier than self injury, isn't it?

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Question:  Lately I've been feeling really worthless.  My medication keeps me from feeling depressed like I used to be, but I don't feel right or good.  It makes me want to cut myself, but I don't want to get back into that so I call up some guy and I have sex with him.  That seems to work for awhile but I know it probably isn't healthy, still it is better than cutting myself, right?  

Answer:  That is like asking "would you rather be eaten by sharks or ants?"  Both options stink and  no matter which option you choose you end up dead.  

Any time you drink, eat, jog, cut yourself, have sex, etc... for the purpose of changing/masking/avoiding the way you feel you are doing that activity medicinally.  If it works you run the risk of forming a habit which can easily become an addiction. 

How can we tell the difference between someone who just really likes drinking, or sex, or jogging, and someone who is addicted?  When a person continues to choose those behaviors even when they have started impairing relationships and life functioning (school, job, legal issues, physical health).  A real simple test is if you have lied about how much you do a behavior you are on the road to addiction.  

People who use self injury or disordered eating to manage emotions are highly likely to trade one addictive behavior for another as they seek to abstain from what ever has been identified as "the problem" behavior. 

We often see a triangle with self injury at one point, disordered eating at another, and risk taking behaviors (sex, drugs, anything dangerous) at the third.  To replace the benefit the person was getting from one behavior they shift to another never recognizing that all of these behaviors are designed to shield them from their emotions.

The 12 step model of abstinence finds many people who have traded avoiding their feelings through  substance abuse to avoiding them with the support of relationships and community.  While this is a good start unless they work the 12 steps all the way through and learn to listen to their feelings instead of managing them, they will never be truly healthy.   


 
If I am forced to answer your question, as counter intuitive as it sounds I would have to say that in general self injury is probably safer than casual sex, because there is only one unhealthy person involved, where as casual sex often involves two.  It is still a choice between sharks and ants. 

I have heard many people echo your feelings about medication. Medication does not solve anything it just helps you to see clearly enough to work with the problems that are really there, but if you continue to avoid those problems you will not get healthier. 

There is nothing wrong with drinking, jogging, or sex, if you do them safely and for the purpose of exploring and enjoying your life.  If you want to stop feeling worthless then you need to explore the reasons for why you feel that way, and until you do that you will continue trading one dangerous behavior for another until you die.